Spinning: "Bu Shi Ji Nian" - Wu Ke Qun

okie..it pretty much suxs to know that Shariann is posted to some unknown company. Kinda like feeling suxky bout it. O Come on...wad kinda crap shit is that company all about since u cant find it from the net right. So have been askin friends bout their companies they worked for. LoLx...i too have matured friends haha...So I muz start thinking when I start classical liao.

And I know I said I didnt want to go out but was rather reluctant to leave home when Novie ask me to accompany her for dinner. So I went to HK cafe again. Okie countless time since I last went there with Eric. Come to think of it, the first n last time was both with Eric too. Haha...We chatted alot.

And yea I just realised Im pretty much still am lost. I dunno y. I gotta move on. But I feel like Im still being spunned ard in a black pool. Sucking me in. I have no life. No gravity n oxygen in this black pool. I dunno. I have so much things that I want and wish for. Im turning 19 soon. Lonesome yea..the bleakest part but wad can I do. Like I said friends come n go. Certain special someone do come n go too. But Im glad I still got hold to a few. Clubbing life may be united to one life right now but hey Im still growin up and socializing more will eventually split the unity of just going to one club. Haha...lost..me oo am lost too. Dunno wad Im talkin bout either. I just feel being constraint to a certain extent. No one knows. I am fighting real hard to break free. I dun like being restrain and I definitely dun like doing wad I dun like. I try to give back as much I receive it. I wan to fly. I just wanna fly. I just wanna finish everything here and leave my worries behind. Dun wanna look back at it anymore. I have set my path n the kinda life that I long for. Might just sponsor a child with Novie soon. So Im pretty much giving back what I get. Something I had wanted to do for quite some time already. I want to continue to study. I hope to fly when Im done with my military services. I wan to fly for a couple of yrs before I study again. Or the other way round and continue to study. My inner child is fighting real hard inside for me to break free. Alot of disapproval soon but no one can stop me now.

I know how tempting it can be when u start flying. How temptation can suck the soul out of u. But I hope that I would learn to control myself and fight it. Haha...as if I can. Muahaha...Temptations...just like temptation islands...anything and everything can happen.

I want to be loved. But I dun feel it yet. LoLx...wad am I gonna do on my birthday? Should I land myself in a drunkard state? Or should I just let it go like those I had in the past. Do nothing n bum ard at home? Haha...never done anything special on my birthday really. No one to share the joy with. Haha not to mention valentine's day la. Stupid day for me I think. Cos Im still single. Someone save me from humanility and mortality. Someone pls tell me what can i do for a change cans? Eric will still b at HK on my birthday so no one to crap with or rather sit down n talk with. Will someone nice pls celebrate my birthday asides I know that family might do it for like the first time in dunno how many yrs. I think it stopped somewhere during mid-pri age. LoLx...Well the most I guess on my birthday u can catch me at Orchard or any part of the world walkin and being an idiot tellin myself Happy Birthday. Maybe I will go to one of the pub n haf a drink and going back home before midnite ba. Thats how I might celebrate it. Haha...Unless Unless Shariann joins me for some fun n laughter la...

Late liao..I dun wan to b bloggin on my tots anymore...Scary to be thinkin bout it now...LoLx...


| N a m e C r u i s e d A t 2/05/2006 01:53:00 AM |