Spinning: "Loose" - Nelly Furtado Whole Album

B prepare for a long entry of emotional brawl n updates...

Okie, I know I have been missing alot in life!!!! I feel like I dun even have a life of my own. I dun even have my own identity. I feel like sometimes Im just hiding behind someone's shadow. Though I dun even know who haha...Just so tired...really really really am very tired with this kinda harsh busy life!!!! Suxsssss!!!!!!!!!

Having 2 wks break but life doesnt seem to be kind to me. My 2 wks break are filled with driving, work and projects. Helped. I nid a life. Marcus is right. I nid to enjoy myself. I nid to have fun. Nid to loosen myself. Or else I will go berserkly crazy!!!! I decided to drop out from the IMF conference partially because I am too busy with all the non-stops projects as well as Im kinda fed up with how they do stuffs. I mean it could be a wide-eye opening for me..gettin to know new people and stuffs but I just feel that they r not responsible as well as not systematic enuff. Their actions just irks me alot...

Okie have not been posting anything new for quite some time liao...Argh...just shows n proves how busy I was!!!! Had 3 tests this wk. And I think Im gonna flunked 2 papers namely "Investment" and "General Insurance". This really suxs considering the fact that Im gonna flunked my paper for the first time. Never knew final yr's responsibilities is that huge and workin life is not helpin me at all. Im disappointed. Disappointed with ymself. I have to buck up. Must get the concept right and start revising my work or else I can prepare to kiss my white arse goodbye and repeat another sem. Why white cos of too much swimming dumbo. Thats the only outstanding part if u were to look at my bod with ur nekkid eyes. Haha...

Am looking forward to actually have some free and spare time to go out!!! Went Mdm Wong for a drink with Shariann n Pris. Sometimes life suxs considering the fact u found out stuffs that some people might b quite hypocrite. I wun rule out the fact that both of them especially one might be hypocrite at times thats y I am struggling with the fact to think str8. Is it worth it to even be friends? If friends r meant to b like that then I rather lose someone I have known since Sec sch. I dun nid this kind of friends. I like Pris loads but then I guess she's being hanging out with Shariann too much that her senses r all being blocked or either that she just hmmm I dunno maybe we r just not as close we used to be anymore. Would I say Shariann is a bad influence. Nope I wun say that either but just that sometimes she just dun get the gripped of what friends r supposed to b. Was it wrong of me to actually reveal my inner secret to them? I wonder aloud. Yes, I hope to have people who accept certain things but then I dun seem to find the support on that issue. Yes, I can conclude we aint close anymore. To them, clubbing, drinkin, boyfriends, guys r their main piority in life. Kinda sick of hearin much more stuffs already. Empty promises not fulfilled. Im sick..really sick...I went thru that stage of losing best friends and Im not afraid to go thru that stage again. I dun wanna b seen partyin with them cos sometimes u will jus feel left out cos they r gonna b busy. Yes, I would still like to go to Mambo nite but maybe when I get to know new friends from Uni then I will go for my first Mambo nite. Or else can always wait till these 4 girls to grow up n matured to go clubbin. Eh Erica, Rach, Cheryl n Janet. Haha...Yes right now, if they r readin it..it might caused tension to relationships but yes until Shariann learn to actually respect the feelings of friends then we shall talked bout it ba....In sch I will just avoid...Avoid is the only word I will sae.

Had my fair share of fun too. Went Mox on last Sat with Zach. Haha...wanted to prove that I aint popular so went there for a test to prove my values!!! Haha...and yes turn out I aint...cos no one talked to me. So yep!!! And happen that I know that Ian is celebratin his b'day there and was co-erced by Zach to jus say Happy Birthday. Felt like a fool tryin to find him actually. Yes, I know he is busy but its like a searching for a needle in the haystack. So when I finally wish him Happy B'day, he tot I was there for his b'day but I wasnt cos my trip there was planned in advance and was caught in a moment of speechlessness when he said thank you for comin and ask me whether I wanna get a drink. Faint!!!!!

Yep and this wk, was a presentful day. Got presents from Eugene. Sweet of him to get stuffs for me from the flea market and other places. Haha...I got a new Braun Buffel keychain and I adore it very much. Though I am still aimin to get this Agnes B one provided I passed my Driving test on Mon (wish me luck)!!! Second try and I hoped to pass!!!!!! I got a pullover sweater too. Gigantic huge but I guess its alrite and still wearable!!!! So I muz promise myself that I will at least wear it for a few occasions. And damn bloody happy was Eugene cos this is the first time that I actually liked what he bought!!! Muahahaha

Okie, was pretty distraut with the initial "White-Spots". Dunno y last wk n this wk, alot o people ask me wads wrong with my face. Argh...all this questioning is just a slow way of killin me. I luv my face alot. I luv my complexion alot though I hate it alot. I take special care of it. And I am aware of the growth of the white spots. So I turn to the docs for helped on 6/6/2006! Haha bad omen day. Haha...Doc actually tell me that there's nothin he can do to my face!!!! He say its spreadin...My chin, my cheeks, my side and my neck plus the back of my bod. Argh...it turns out that they r not white spots. Haha..Its no pigmentation, the only way I can do is to put moisturizer or sun block and avoid sun exposure. So which means, less swimming now. Wad the hell. It will take months until I get back the colours. Haix...And actually I still have the mood to joke that they r actually skin cancer. Haha...and I might turn out to be a Michael Jackson freak. Yikes...abandon that bloody tots!!!!! Realised Yu Ren Sheng they do sell some pigmentation pills...should I ask my dad whether I should buy it??? Hmmm.....Helped!!!!

Okie, I finally found a mentor too for my Entrepreunership project. Charles Ng. Haha...am quite happy n satisfied with my effort. Not a bad guy (have not gotten the chance to meet him yet but soon since nid to conduct an interview). He himself is an Entrepreuner. But then experience wise aint that riped. However, at tender age he won the SEP award which convinced my tutor that he is eligible to b our mentor!!! Yeah....And if Im able to niche a friendship with him. I might consider goin to his clinic to just assess my skin. Haha...I just wanna get rid of some stupid zits on my face!! Argh...and hopefully can get DISCOUNT!!!!








| N a m e C r u i s e d A t 6/10/2006 02:17:00 AM |